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Art of Leadership Blog

Moving Past Denial

4/14/2020

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During a time of change, especially like the Covid-19 Pandemic, people will go through the five stages of grief. Based off of Elizabeth Kubler-Ross' work, the five stages of grief also relate to any change process that we go through. The five stages are:
  1. Denial - this is a state of shock and a way to pace facing the grief. It is nature's way of only letting in as much as we can handle.
  2. Anger - here we may lash out at others for the pain we are facing. The more you feel it the more it will dissipate and you will heal.
  3. Bargaining - in this stage you feel the guilt and ask questions such as, "What if," or "If only." We want our life restored to the way it was.
  4. Depression - here we are firmly in the present and feeling the pain of the loss. This is an appropriate feeling for a loss or a change and we don't know how long it will last.
  5. Acceptance - here we finally accept that we are not going back and that this is the new normal.
The stages of grief are not always linear and one can move through the stages and then fall back or skip a stage. Also people may move through the stages at different paces. I know that I have now, after 4 weeks, moved through the denial stage, and had feelings of anger, bargaining and depression for sure. I am currently still probably in the bargaining phase. Where are you? Know that these phases are natural. Know that as this is a curve with our productivity dipping the most at the bargaining stage and then going back up after that. So if you are not being as productive as you usually were that is normal as well. What stage are you currently in? How can you honor the stage you are in right now?
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    Monica Thakrar

    Monica Thakrar has over 18 years experience in business focused mainly on strategy, change management, leadership development, training and coaching resulting in successful implementations of large scale transformation programs.  

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